I went to have blood taken yesterday morning and there was quite a wait. The computers were still struggling after the storm, and so, everyone understood and was patient. Usually, there is a bit of anxiety, foot-tapping and looking at watches, because most of the people have been fasting and no one has had their morning coffee, but, yesterday, everyone was calm. I think we slowed in the storm.
As I adjust back to having power in the house, I feel like I did after I finished treatment. Nothing was expected of me when I was in chemotherapy. If I rose and brushed my teeth, people cheered. A walk was like winning the Olympics. I was present with each step. Then, treatment ended and I was dropped off the conveyor belt. I was back to choices. While in treatment, there was no anxiety around choice or accomplishment. I did what I had energy to do and I did it well. I slept when I was tired and ate when I was hungry. How simple is that. It is the enlightenment path. That is why most who have been through chemotherapy consider it a gift.
Now, I am again back to choice after a break. My power is on, and a piece of me misses a day where watching and tending a fire is considered "enough." Now, people would look at me askance, if they asked what I did today, and I said I sat and watched and tended a fire. Now, I expect, and the world expects with me, and that is a good thing, obviously, and yet I think we each need to program into our calendars, days of rest.
Here are my morning ramblings of yesterday and today.