Today I opened all windows and doors and worked outside. Tiger and Bella seemed to be around, and then, Bella wasn't, and she still isn't. I know Tiger is worried and I am worried, too, so we look in all the corners of the house, and we have checked the yard and called, and no Bella is here right now. Perhaps she will show up soon and all will be okay, but in the moment, I am not feeling so well, nor is Tiger.
Because I couldn't sleep, I started reading Ruth Ozeki's book, All Over Creation. It is a beauty and ends with, in my opinion, a positive message. I believe in change. We have changed. Look how much organic produce is now available. We need to believe, and we need a leader that unites us all. I believe in the movement that is Barack Obama.
I have always felt that Jesus feeding the multitudes was not meant to be taken literally, but was meant to show that in uniting people and speaking of the power of love, people felt fed, and felt full as though they had feasted lavishly on bread and fish. We feed on words, create with belief.
When I was eleven, we moved to Florida, and there were separate water fountains for "blacks" and "whites." Now, we have a Black running for president, an individual who is generating excitement and getting people out to enthusiastically vote. There are people who say he doesn't say anything. I wonder about that. It seems that Hillary is good at listing what she is going to do, but she is so disliked, I wonder if once again, her plans will fail. She can't do it alone. She needs to be able to lead, inspire, and adapt, every day, every moment. Rigidity does not fit these times. We need resilience and compromise. We cannot foresee what the days will bring, but we can stay open in our response. We also need candidates who are open in releasing their tax returns. What is that about? Do the Clintons not want us to see how wealthy they have now become in these last seven years?
I have a wonderful print by Brian Andreas hanging on my wall. It is called Center on Wheels, and says, "I spent a long time trying to find my center until I looked closely one night and found it had wheels and moved easily in the slightest breeze, so now I spend less time sitting and more time sailing."
These are times for mobility, for setting sails and also allowing space to drift. It is to live honoring the pause, compassion, and patience..
I remember now a boss my father had who had the gift of knowing how to choose people who worked hard for him, intelligently and creatively. He could sit and rest a bit because he carefully chose. Their work reflected on him.
We need someone who chooses well. We need someone who believes there can be a change, who inspires us to believe in change.
We need the passion and optimism, tempered by reality, of youth. We need direction and leadership, and not dirty tricks.
I stay awake, praying that little Bella comes skipping up the stairs. I don't think I can sleep until I know where she is.
I don't think Obama is a god. He himself is honest as to his humanness. We need someone to inspire us through these tough times. I think he is the one.
I am a realist. I know the odds are not good for little Bella. I worry about her surviving a night outside, though at least it has warmed up, but where can she be, and maybe someone has found her and is taking care of her until it is light. In four hours now, it will be light enough for me to go outside and look. It has been such a quiet day. Where can she be?
Prayers for Bella!