Heart Happy (cathy_edgett) wrote,
Heart Happy

Inbetween -

In between


Today, in my writing with Jane, I find myself with the mottled sky of blue and pink, and the changing of the tides.  When I cross the Richmond bridge, and look down sometimes, the tide is in that changing, not going in or out, just sort of roiling there, feeling a call to mobilize one way or the other, and turn. 


Perhaps, that is where I am today.  I feel well, and in that, I feel sad.  There is no story to the sadness.  I think today I might touch the tears that have been glacially held for awhile.  Perhaps the warmth of yesterday allowed a thaw, or the feeling well is allowing a space to feel sadness, just that, sadness, or perhaps, it is wholeness, that I feel, sadness and joy at the same time, the place of deepest feeling.  Perhaps, I touch there today, and there, for me, there are no words.  I am feeling today, just that, peace, and tears held like fog in suspension, enclosing a place to be.  


The Chinese New Year approaches, a celebration of new moon to full, of abundance, family, connection.  Fifteen days to celebrate the coming of the New Year.  I like that.  It fits my mood.  We need more than one. 


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