We lost power yesterday, and then, my internet connection wasn't working, and since I knew it also wasn't working in Mountain View, I let it go until this morning, where a lovely Comcast man directed me through typing in Ping and a bunch of numbers, a bunch of times, and unplugging and waiting and plugging, three different plugs, and now, I am back, not having even read the paper yet today. Ack!! What a trauma. : ) How very spoiled I am!
I had a wonderful Mother's Day with Jeff and Jan, and am feeling pretty zippy.
Radiation is at 10:15, and then, I see the dermatologist at 11:10, so I am hoping things are on-time today. I usually don't schedule things so closely together, but, thought I would try it today.
Ah, it is lovely to be back!!
I went to the dermatologist and received good news. He said that what is on my head is not a problem and he froze it off. He then looked at a clear spot that appeared in the last two days, and cut it off. He didn't feel it would be a problem though. His nurse enthused over me, and loved the softness of my hair, and said I was the picture of health, so how do I feel right now? Like the picture of health, and I am. Yay!!!
Two more radiations to go. Yay!!
When I took my shower this morning, I noticed the water hitting that underarm part was pretty painful. I asked about that, and they said it will get worst, so I don't now how clean I am going to be on the left side for the next few days, but I will try.
I also realized today that because I drive a stick I am more aware of the stop and go than a person with an automatic might be. I like driving a stick, and the constant shifting, can, at times, feel old.
When I was waiting in the doctor's office, I saw the fog drifting across in elongated clumps like dinosaurs. Now, the fog is completely in and I am enclosed in cold and wind. Mandu is happily snuggled, and we are both very happy campers. I hope your day is as good as mine.
My brother and Katy attended the Yankees baseball game in NY on Saturday. For Mother's Day and breast cancer awareness, the players wore pink wrist bands, pink ribbons, and some of the players used pink bats. When my brother emailed this to me, I thought it must be a typo, pink hats, but no, it is pink bats. The players autograph them and they are auctioned off, but as my brother says, what would Babe Ruth think? It is pretty funny, and a good cause, but I truly never did think to see a pink bat, though I haven't yet seen it, only heard about it. We live in quite a world. Enjoy!
My dermatologist's son has cancer and has a three year regimen of chemotherapy. He is one and half years through, and they are feeling confident now he will make it, but it is hard to imagine what he, the child, and his parents have been through. Tears filled my eyes when he told me, and they fill my eyes now. I cannot imagine anything worst than watching your child suffer, and not knowing if he will live or die. Prayers and good thoughts I request today for Dr. Laub's son, who, I am sure will be very well, and yet, he still has another year and a half of chemo. I find that unimaginable, and, as Dr. Laub says, what else can you do. That is how you make it through. You have no choice, and so, we do. Anyway, prayers are in order, I see now, for the whole Laub family. Thank you!
Candice, on her birthday, sends this from May Sarton. Happy birthday to Candice today!!! Yay!!
"Even a year's not long, yet moments are.
This moment, yours and mine, and always given,
When the leaf falls, the ripple opens far,
And we go where all animals and children are,
The world is open. Love can breathe again."
May it continue so.
I am reading a wonderful book, "Horse Sense for the Leader Within," by Ariana Strozzi.
I am going to offer a passage from the book because I believe it shows the power of how we treat another, and what it does for that person.
Ariana is talking about social systems, and how she thinks we respond so much to horses because we, like them, need a social system. We need to belong. We need a herd.
Here is the story she tells:
Francine was a homeless woman who visited my friend's church to receive free meals and a place to sleep on cold nights. Most people walked by this woman on the street as she talked to herself, the cracks in her path or the bushes in the park, but when she visited the church, she was greeted with a hug and a warm smile. She would bring him photographs of the sidewalk and tell him long stories about what the lines in the pavement meant. My friend understood her need to connect with another person and to share her stories. He decided to give Francine a home and the task of preparing the dining hall for dinner. Over time, she took to her new responsibility with a quiet smile and dutiful hands.
At each meal, she greeted the visitors with the same kind heart with which the pastor greeted her. As she began to feel good about herself, she made new friends. Her dependability was quickly recognized by a local restaurant. They took her in, gave her a bed in the back room and a job cleaning the restaurant.
Francine still visited church regularly because it was a family to her. One day, when the pastor greeter her, Francine pulled him aside. She thanked him for taking her in and she told him that she was happy now. She no longer heard voices and felt that she belonged to people she could take care of.
I am asked how it feels to have only two more days. It has been almost eight months as I look back to the beginning of this in September.
I have been trying not to get too excited, but now, tonight, I am feeling the prison gate open and I feel like I am entering a magic garden.
I am stepping carefully there. I feel like a ballerina with long, delicate toes, feeling my way.
I read these words from a card Jeff gave me for my birthday.
Each day comes
bearing its own gifts.
Untie the ribbons.
Ruth Ann Schabaker
May we each untie the ribbons and wave them freely about. I feel warm and full, excited and calm. I feel myself walking through a threshold into a world more beautiful than I have ever known before.
May this be so for us all, each day, a new threshold and a garden beyond and fulfilling all our dreams.