Heart Happy (cathy_edgett) wrote,
Heart Happy

Evening sought -

It is so beautiful today, and I have been outside watering. What a treat!  In one day, hair has sprung out on my arms and legs. It is amazing. I wish the hair on my head would sprout as fast, but perhaps it is,  and it is just less obvious up there.

I missed the protest on Darfur yesterday, the gathering of people on the Golden Gate bridge, and I feel sad about that, and yet, I realize again today that my energy is not what I might wish. I am still having to pace and isolate.

Today, I realized that I often used to not know how I felt until I was over the top, either angry or sad, but I am learning to feel it now and honor it, and I think that is because I don't have the energy to block it. Today, I feel sadness, just that, no story. Perhaps, another day, I will feel anger, and certainly I could rationalize justification for that with all that is going on, but I'm not sure that is appropriate. I think response is appropriate, and feeling what I feel, but I think I am learning now  to bring myself more into balance on all the weather patterns circulating  through, and to use my energy for doing, and honoring  my use of fuel.  I am trying to take a longer view, to witness, and, as I say, to use my energy to do what I can do, and not stew - ah, now, the Serenity prayer comes to mind.  Yes, that works, too.  

            God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
                          The courage  to change the things I can
                                   And the wisdom to know the difference

Today, I was with a poem of James Wright where he is  in a hammock, and realizing that is the most important thing he can do, lie there, aware,  in a hammock.

I thought of that today as I did not cross things off my list. My list still awaits and I celebrated a lovely day.

I look for James Wright's hammock poem, and in the looking, find this one by James Wright.


As the plump squirrel scampers
Across the roof of the corncrib,
The moon suddenly stands up in the darkness,
And I see that it is impossible to die.
Each moment of time is a mountain.
An eagle rejoices in the oak trees of heaven,
This is what I wanted.

A few years ago I wrote a hammock poem.

Little Things

I float on a hammock,
between two trees,
focus my eyes above,

question  why my path is straight,
when the branches,
are what I love.


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