Heart Happy (cathy_edgett) wrote,
Heart Happy

Such a day!

    The fashion show has been my graduation, my letting go of what this year has been.   I had surgery on October 12th, so the anniversary is on approach.   Today, I went through closets and drawers, and gave away or threw away everything related to cancer and chemo.    My wig is ready to give away, along with all my hats, and some of the camisoles.   Some had the lanolin smell that will never wash out, so they are in the trash.   All my barrettes are going to Good Will.  I don't think I will have long hair again.

    Perhaps the biggest thing I did today was take the hair that we cut off in November out of the envelope.  I looked at it, and touched it.  It is soft and silky, and I truly did love the blondeness of it, and I saw no reason to keep it, to hold onto what was.  I am not my hair.    I tossed the strands off the deck for the birds, and even though it has been separated from my head for almost a year, and even, though my understanding is that hair is not alive, it seemed alive.  It seemed so alive, and so am I.

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