Heart Happy (cathy_edgett) wrote,
Heart Happy

Thoughts -

     I am working with a few days right now with the book, the days April 6th to 8th.   You, who have been with me a long time, may remember that I finished the puzzle in the radiation waiting room, and I was exhilarated that I could do such a thing.   Before that, I was heavily in chemo mind and unable to focus on shapes in such a way as to complete a puzzle.  I also began "horse therapy." I feel so fragile as I work again with this time period.  Each time I go through I am able to feel a little more.  I am moving slowly through last year now, taking it in with care.  In this moment, I feel like I need to vomit and maybe I do.  I need to cleanse.

    I am meeting a friend for lunch, so am allowing this nausea and fragility to move on through. 

    How long it takes to heal and I am grateful that I am able to feel all the parts.  It is odd to read one's own words and feel sick.  Last year they were just what was happening.  Now, I more deeply feel the hurt and see the little girl.

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