I start a new drug next time, Taxol, which comes from the Yew tree, and so feels friendler to me. The good news is that there is no nausea with Taxol. The bad news is that there is tingling in the feet and hands. They give you Benadryl when you go in for Taxol, so it will be a sleepy time, and it is longer, five hours, so I will be dropped off and go to sleep. That works for me.
Today seemed to go easily. My nurse drew the chemo nurse card to get back from her Christmas vacation, so she got bumped to first class and was quite relaxed.
I spoke with the nurse practitioner about how rough these two weeks were. She said almost everyone has this cold and cough right now, and it is even tougher for me to get rid of it. Also, this is when the adrenalin wears off that has been carrying me through up to now, and so physiologically I am depleted, which affects my mood. Also, all the excitement and energy of the holidays contribute to the extreme fatigue I am feeling. I felt so good in talking to her, in really being able to say how hard this is, and to know she understands. It is hard to explain to you, and it felt so good to talk to someone who works with this everyday, and knew exactly how down I felt. She assured me it is normal to feel this way. I'm normal. Yay!!
Chris and I went out for a lovely lunch afterward, and celebrated. I feel now I can make it through, and I'm hoping Taxol goes easily. There is no way to know how it will affect each person. They absolutely can't say, and I understand that. This with my feet is an unusual side-effect, and she said it will be worst this time since I had it last time, so I am now prepared. Again, it will probably be no shoes or walking for at least a week, but, now, I am prepared. It won't scare me this time. I understand, and so it looks like this will be a quiet two weeks for me, as I move these drugs through, and wait for the next round. It is an odd way to begin the new year, and yet, I feel rejuvenated and young.
I am happy, today, in evolving my cave! Great love and joy and peace and ease to YOU!!